For years, Ruth Soukup, her husband Chuck Soukup, and their children have been playing a game together called “High, Low, and Interesting.” This simple idea has proven to be highly effective in encouraging children, especially teenagers, to open up and communicate with their parents.
Every evening during dinner, this Florida-based family takes turns sharing their high points, low points, and the most interesting events of the day.
“Children aren’t always the best at expressing themselves,” Ruth told The Epoch Times. “Sometimes it’s hard to get our kids to tell us what happened at school.”
“But my two kids love competition, especially when they were younger, they loved playing games. We joked that everything was a competition, not in a crazy way, but in a fun way.”
A few years ago, the couple got the idea to play this game after watching the 1999 movie “The Story of Us,” in which characters played a game called “Highs and Lows.” To make it more exciting for their daughters Maggie and Annie, they added the “Interesting” part.
The game has only one rule: each person must share at least one high point, each low point must be followed by a high point (two highs are allowed, no lows). After sharing, each member votes on the most interesting event, with the winner receiving one dollar.
The first time they played, 4-year-old Annie won the game. When faced with the choice between watching a movie that evening or earning a dollar, she chose the latter, and this tradition has carried on since.
Ruth is an online entrepreneur and writer from Washington state, while her husband is a former aerospace engineer from the Chicago area. Both emphasize the importance of living in the present moment.
Now that their children are older – Maggie is almost 18 and Annie is 15 – they are busy with friends and sports, not gathering for dinner every night.
“If we have three nights a week where we sit around the dinner table, we’re lucky,” the mom said.
However, “High, Low, and Interesting” remains a fun part of mealtime – even guests are encouraged to join in. Many times, what someone shares leads to further conversation, allowing parents to gain more insight into their daughters’ lives. This also helps them become more observant about what’s happening around them.
“Sometimes,” Ruth said, “they come home and ask, ‘Are we having dinner together tonight?’ because they know they have something interesting to share, and they know they’ll win. So, they might request to do it. Other times, of course, they’ll say, ‘Oh, I don’t feel like playing. Why do we have to play this every night?'”
“You never know what you’re going to get with teenagers.”
Ruth mentioned that being a teenager is a challenging phase in life, and she can’t imagine the emotions, school pressures, and friendship challenges a teenage girl faces in the age of social media. The moments during dinner become even more precious because it’s a time for the whole family to communicate.
“I think being intentional about your family life makes sense,” Ruth said. “Even if you don’t have a lot of time, you can still open up dialogue. We’ve been playing this game for over 10 years, and we still play it every dinner.”
“We’ve always tried to be truly open and honest with our kids. They’re not fully grown up yet, but they are pretty great kids. Raising them with faith is important to us. Knowing that there’s something greater, knowing that there are loftier goals, knowing that children are a gift from God, these are very important parts of our lives.”